Ok, here we go baby, it’s 7:40, GAMETIME! Oh, good, it’s Celtics-Wizards! How very exciting. The Celtics have narrowly increased the margin, it’s 113-84. This could go down to the wire. I’ll check back in a few.
It MUST be gametime now, it’s 7:50. Oh boy! I get to watch the last minute of the Celtics-Wizards game!!! What an exciting finish, this is so much better than watching the beginning of a game between two good teams. I hope they do post-game analysis.
First Quarter:
9:00 – Interesting, it appears that NBA games now start with only nine minutes on the clock in the first quarter. Also, both teams are automatically awarded 4 points at the start of the game (just to make it fair). TNT: Where FAIL happens.
7:45 – LaMarcus scores twice easily, once on a running hook through the lane and again on a long jumper. Good ball movement to start.
6:10 – Terrible interior defense by Portland leads to a nice dish inside by Deron Williams and an easy Brewer slam.
6:00 – TNT has a good system where, by having no introduction and missing the beginning of the game, Doug Collins can watch the first part and attempt to make himself sound intelligent. Unfortunately for him, one of his Keys to the Game is “metronome,” so he blew that one already.
-I’m a little worried about Deron Williams. He hasn’t been himself lately coming off of his ankle injury, but he always seems to light it up against us. He already has four quick assists.
5:31 – Another Aldridge jumper off a Steve Blake assist. How about LaMarcus in the first quarter? What is he, the 5-hour Energy designated driver? He’s got ten first-quarter points but the Blazers trail, 14-16.
3:50 – We are simply getting embarrassed on the inside. This time it’s CJ Miles throwing it down off a Williams assist. God I hate the Jazz.
-Apparently Craig Sager just talked to the “Mormon Tabernacle Choir” about metronomes. I can’t imagine a more exciting conversation. Isn’t that the group that does “Let the Bodies Hit the Floor”? I love that song.
1:58 – Roy drains a three. He’s shaken off the effects of that tough loss well. What a champ.
1:20 – More new and improved Travis Outlaw! He elevated and looked poised to take another difficult shot, but thought better of it and passed, leading to an open Rudy three pointer. I am so proud.
Second Quarter:
11:12 – Kyle Korver hits a jumper. The announcers call him “the former Missouri Valley Conference player of the year.” Isn’t that kind of like being the used Kia dealership salesman of the month? I…I guess that’s…good.10:36 – Channing Frye fouls Harpring hard on a fast break, and the refs call a flagrant foul. Really, a flagrant foul? Even a JAZZ fan wouldn’t call that a flagrant foul. Actually, they would. Did I mention I hate the Jazz?
9:33 – A 16-footer by Brevin Knight makes it 37-27 Jazz. The Blazers have yet to score this quarter.
8:45 – Sergio drives and drops in a floater. You know it’s bad when Sergio Bending Rodriguez is the only player getting into the paint. Give that man a beer and a cigar.
7:04 – Doug Collins calls Przybilla the best backup center in the league. As a wise man once said: “Even the blind squirrel finds a nut.”
6:58 – Sergio for three! It’s a 9-0 Portland run and we’re right back in it. He is now officially my third favorite Spaniard behind Rudy and Manuel Jalón Corominas, inventor of the mop (go ahead, look it up).
5:43 – Mehmet Okur spins on Aldridge and dunks. I mean, that was a good move, but you know you’re from Utah when your team’s most exciting play is an Okur “slam dunk.” It’s the basketball equivalent of the Family Circus cartoon “It’s Apparent You’re a Parent if…” They LOVE them some Family Circus in Salt Lake City.
Sidenote: This led to the following conversation between Mike and me:
Mike: “Oh man! Jeffrey mispronounced spaghetti!!! Hahaha! PUHSKETTY!”
Me: “Look at the HILARIOUS route Billy took to get home from school!”
Mike: “That’s not the shortest way! BILLY!”
Me: “Why did he climb that tree? How unnecessary and inconvenient!”
Mike: “Kids.”
4:10 – Okur hits a wide open three off a high pick, then AK47 scores way too easily on a drive to make it 50-40. I consider driving my pen into my temple, but think better of it and reach for another beer. Could be a long night.
3:25 – Roy stuffs Deron Williams, leading to a nice Sergio lay up on the other end. Watch out, Manuel!
2:27 – Another easy dunk off the feed to an open Millsap under the basket. Paul Millsap. Funny, even Utah’s black players sound white.
1:57 - Gadzooks! Okur connects on yet ANOTHER open three, giving the Jazz a nine point lead. He has 21 first half points. It’s not fair; they have the spirit of Joseph Smith on their team. How do we compete with that? I know! Let’s wander into the desert and return with a golden book written by God about how to play transition defense!
Halftime:
-The Blazers played an extremely poor first half. We had no post presence on either end of the floor and shot just 4 of 15 from behind the arc. I fear Chuck’s wrath.
-He was surprisingly non-abrasive about how poorly the Blazers played. He did, however, mention that, for the Jazz, “injuries are the great unequalizer.” Too many potential jokes…brain overloading…
-Still, considering how poorly we’ve played, it won’t take more than a little defense, a few shots falling, and some strong rebounding to get Portland right back in the game. It’s Pryz time.
Third Quarter:
11:25 – Oden makes a nice strong move toward the hoop, making the baby hook and drawing the foul. I would be happier about this if his missed free throw didn’t result in an easy Jazz lay up in transition.
10:06 – Oden is fighting for the ball in the trenches. I love that pissed-off look on his face. I will call him Angry Greg. Can we keep him mom? Can we?
Sidenote: There’s been a lot of grumblings lately about Oden’s sullen mood and disappearance from the public eye. Some media members have noted Greg’s lack of fun as having a negative effect on the Blazers’ locker room. Maybe so, I don’t know, I don’t have that kind access to really see for sure. However, I was thinking that, if Oden’s emotions have such an impact on the Blazers, shouldn’t the opposite also be true?
I have no illusions; the kid has a long way to go. But when he gets his offensive game going and starts dunking on people’s heads, will his emotions swing to the other extreme? We want the joking, hand-slapping, barking Oden that we saw in the 2007 NCAA championship game. And I firmly believe we will see that. Hopefully it’s sooner rather than later.
8:00 – Two easy Ronnie Brewer lay ups. The screen shows us that the Jazz lead the fast break points battle 22-4. God. Deron Williams looks like his old self again. And by old, I mean balding. What is he, like 24? I smell a huge Rogaine advertising contract. How fitting. I hate the Jazz.
6:40 – Following a CJ Miles three, Roy drives, misses, and tips in his miss. Does he have to take over again? The difference between the last few games and the rest of the season is that Aldridge and Roy are forced to carry a much larger portion of the scoring. When nothing else is working, we go through our two best players. However, we don’t seem to WIN.
Sidenote: It’s official, Jerry Sloan is an Ent. Also he has the most wins of any coach with a single franchise by a huge margin. What’s that? No championships? As Treebeard says, “Brrharroom. There have been no Entings for a terrible long count of years.”
4:40 –
Roy hits a long two to make it 70-59. He has scored our last eight points. Where did Aldridge go? What happened to feeding him against Okur? Argh.2:51 – Brandon is back at the line. He is really taking over. In other news, Kirilenko is in. Is it just me or does he perpetually look like he just ate a blue Blow Pop?
1:22 – Wild circus shot by Roy. After getting his shot blocked from behind, he grabs the ball out of the air and tosses a left-handed shot up without hitting the ground. If we were playing 21, the Jazz would be back to zero.
0:05 – Guess who? Roy at the line again. He hits them both and now has Portland’s last 15 points. As great as he is, that is not a good sign. 78-66, Jazz lead.
Fourth Quarter:
11:10 – Two quick Portland turnovers to start the quarter. I was about to say that, as poorly as we’ve played, our defense has shored up and this is still a very winnable game, but not if we just hand them the ball.
10:17 – A TERRIBLE call by the refs when Rudy gets run into by Harpring and picks up a foul. Joseph Smith smiles down upon EnergySolutions Arena and I curse his name.
8:30 – Aldridge nails a jumper, his first points since the first quarter. The question is: Why?
7:15 – He scores again, gets his hands up on D, then gets it back and scores AGAIN. Recently he has become the most consistently active defensive player we have. I love it, especially considering his slow start to the season.
6:41 – Roy buries a three to make it 88-77 Jazz, but we need to make a run now or else this one is in the books.
-This commercial where Lebron’s friend gets his car broken into really irks me. Not only does LBJ openly discuss leaving his hometown team in 2010, but he dances while his friend calls his insurance agent after his car is broken into. Remind me why they want him in New Yo…actually that would fit perfectly in New York. Never mind.
4:50 – Steve Blake misses a three that would have cut the Jazz lead to 6. Our shots just aren’t falling. This one could be over, folks.
3:00 – With a few minutes left and the Jazz up by ten, Utah fans begin filing out of the stadium. This is awful and would never happen at the Rose Garden, where we cheer and cherish every single victory. In their defense, they have to get to bed so they can rise bright and early and catch the newest Family Circus.
1:45 – Bright spot: A nice offensive rebound and score by Angry Greg. I love seeing flashes of what this guy will be able to do.
0:52 – Rudy misses a clutch free throw. Story of the game.
0:12 – Deron Williams rebounds and dribbles out the clock. I feel like destroying something beautiful. Williams’ arm tattoo is far from beautiful, but it will do.
Final Score:
Blazers 88
Jazz 97
Postgame Thoughts:
-No transition defense + no post defense = way too many easy buckets. We killed ourselves in this regard. The fact that it was even competitive late in the game is a testament to Brandon Roy and LaMarcus Aldridge.
-Our shots just weren’t falling. There were multiple instances, in the third quarter in particular, when Rudy was taking open threes and they just weren’t going down. If they had, it would have opened up many more offensive opportunities as the Jazz would be forced to pressure or double.
-Channing Frye had 2 points, a rebound, an assist, and a flagrant foul in 6 minutes. It was one of his better nights in recent memory.
Well that’s it for this edition of the Kobestoppers’ game diary. How frustrating. The good news is, the Blazers go back home to face the lowly Clippers. If we don’t win this game I will be VERY concerned, but we will. After that we have a welcome three days off. Hopefully we can get rested and fired up for eight of the next nine games at home.
Oh, also, I hate the Jazz.
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