1) Back-to-back dominant games.
So far in his career, Oden has struggled with the typical highs and lows of a rookie season. Unfortunately, these highs and lows have been magnified by enormous expectations (oh, and I think he had some kind of surgery last year? I can't remember).
To put it in perspective, Greg has had 12 double-doubles so far this season, in 35 games played. Yet, only once has he had consecutive doubles, way back on November 18th and 19th, and even those were not "dominant" games like the one he had last night against Milwaukee.
Greg knows: Why settle for a single when you can go for a double?
A strong showing against Cleveland would do wonders for his confidence, perhaps teaching him how to carry momentum from one solid performance into the next game.
Likelihood of it happening: Decent. Cleveland is missing Zydrunas Ilgauskus more than Mike misses his autographed Bill Walton head shot when he's out of town. Now, Ben Wallace and Anderson Varejao are nothing to sneeze at on the glass (please, don't sneeze on the glass), but they are no match for Greg if he's hustling. As long as our perimeter defense can help prevent Greg from picking up ticky-tacky fouls on driving guards, Oden should have a good shot at grabbing a bunch of offensive boards.
2) A face-up jump shot.
In my opinion, the one facet of the game in which Andrew Bynum is a step ahead of Old Greg is his straight-up mid-range game. Bynum has the ability to face up from 8-12 feet and knock down jumpers. This opens up a deluge of offensive options by putting added pressure on the defender(s). Since I simply cannot stand to have Bynum be better in any part of the game than Oden, I demand that Oden develop this ASAP.
Now, we know that Oden has soft hands (see below), and Mike and I have postulated that he may be closer to developing his jumper than it may seem at first glance. In each of the last two games, Oden put up little jumpers that weren't particularly close to going in, and I can only imagine that Nate was not really happy with that choice of shot. That said, in the right situations I would love to see Greg work on that touch.
We all know that beirut skills translate seamlessly to basketball. Or not. As if we didn't have enough to make fun of JJ Redick for...
Likelihood of it happening: High to very high. In fact, I'd stake my Army of Darkness Ash S-mart employee action figure on it. The only question is: when? If he can develop a semblance of a stroke this year, it will be quite valuable come the postseason. If not, I'd love to see that worked on over the summer.
3) NOT getting dunked on by Lebron James.
Let's be honest: centers get dunked on. Oftentimes this is the result of poor perimeter defense leading to the big man trying to slide over and make a play, but ending up on a poster. It's happened to Greg multiple times this year (most recently, Gerald Wallace found more holes in the Blazer defense than a Siamese twin blow-up doll) and will most certainly happen again.
However, what Greg does not need is a clip of one #1 pick dunking on another that will have ESPN simultaneously salivating and crapping their pants. Ideally it will be Greg doing the posterizing, but I'm sure LBJ will do his darnedest to prevent that. It might hurt his image!
I will take a life-size poster of this event though...then I'll just paste my face over hers and...uh...what? No, I mean...never mind.
Likelihood of it happening: Depends on our perimeter players. Nicolas, I'm looking at you. Stay in front of Lebron, give him space, let him shoot that 28% from behind the arc all he wants.
4) A PARTY!!!!!
Let's just say, if the Blazers had a game on Friday, I would not be the least bit surprised to see Greg suffering from the dreaded "Flu-like Symptoms." But Portland doesn't play until Saturday so I say, "drink 'em down, big man, drink 'em down!!" It's your 21st birthday after all.
But seriously, ditch these losers. Why are you at this sausagefest? You and Rudy OWN THIS TOWN. Go forth and slay.
Likelihood of it happening: Inevitable.
That's it for Greg's birthday list. Join us in wishing Greg the best on his 21st. Happy birthday Big Greg!!
6 comments:
Bynum dropped 42 & 15 yesterday. Happy Birthday Greg.
Word is that Bynum has tiny genitalia.
AND on Oden's birthday three years ago, Kobe scored 81 points. More birthdays for Greg please!
Actually, speaking of birthdays, I'm actually trying to get Kobe to perform at mine this year. Now, Old Joe has been telling me about Kobe's love of magic for many years (much like Neil Patrick Harris), and I was always a little skeptical. But after watching his impressive disappearing act in the NBA finals, I was finally convinced. That was some otherworldly, Lance Burton-type shit right there. This is going to be the best party ever.
Has any Blazer made it past the first round in their careers? Does that count as disappearing? Or is that simply not appearing?
That's just an obviously false statement. We speak in truths around here.
Post a Comment