Update: Kobe vs. Spurs

Last night featured a glorious Western Conference Finals rematch between the LA Kobe and the San Antonio Spurs. Both teams shot a ridiculous percentage and the game came down the the final shot. Some might credit the Spurs for their gutty win at the last second. Some might fault Derek Fisher for a silly foul to give Roger Mason the opportunity to put the Spurs ahead. Some might criticize the refs for a ticky-tacky call on that same shot.

But they are all wrong.

The Kobestopper of the Night is:

Karma. God. Krishna. Ra. Mother Earth. Will Smith. The Flying Spaghetti Monster.

Whatever your faith, we can agree that a higher power smote the LA Kobe with a metaphorical bolt of white-hot lightning after the team's namesake hit a 3-pointer to put the LA Kobe up by 2. Now, normally the gods would not interfere with something as trifling as a basketball game, but Fate intervened after it saw the following douchebaggery from Kobe Bryant:



That's right folks, after hitting a shot to put the LA Kobe up by 2 with 12 seconds left, Kobe did the "big balls" dance, apparently at someone in the crowd (sidenote: that person is now an honorary Kobestopper. Thank you, mysterious stranger).

Now, there are a lot of circumstances where I would not be the least bit surprised to see Kobe do the big balls dance:

- If Kobe hits a game-winner with no time on the clock,

- If Kobe was getting criticized for his clutch performance and then hit a big shot,

- If Kobe had this man's horrible affliction (NSFW and pretty gross, you've been warned) when "Yeah!" by Usher ft. Ludacris came on in the club.

But not when you have merely put your team ahead with lots of time on the clock.It's not like you're "silencing the critics." It's pretty much agreed that you are the best clutch player in the game. Don't be a douchebag.

Too late.